Do you ever feel marginalized and dismissed simply for your age, the color of your skin, your gender, or your soci0-economic status? Understanding your power and privilege and taking responsibility is key to self improvement as well as societal harmony. You might not feel that you have any more power or privilege than your next-door neighbor, but let’s take a closer look. Recently, a girl friend shared about being blindsided by the notion that she has white privilege. This woman... Read more
We are in a temporary age of physical distancing or social distancing as a societal response to the Covid-19 pandemic. Crisis times require a change in our daily routine as well as mental state. It has been three weeks since the social distancing policy was first announced and two weeks into the transition from residential public schools to online education. Many Americans are understandably stressed from the sudden drastic changes. Moms and Dads, whether we raise kids full time, work... Read more
Anger is a natural emotion that all humans experience in life. Yet, frequent displays of anger is counterproductive to the necessary process of interpersonal healing and problem resolution. Before I continue, please allow me to share a disclaimer: This advice is not written by an expert who has an easy life and is out of touch with reality. Yes, I am a licensed clinical social worker in practice for over fifteen years. But sadly, I have internalized some of these... Read more
What is the balance between selfless love and the responsibility for self-preservation? Regarding the immigration dilemma, is maintaining law and order pivotal to America’s ability to welcome foreigners from all over our diverse world? It seems that in today’s political climate, people are mistaking mass illegal immigration on America’s southern border as the presence of refugees who are seeking asylum (from political or religious persecution, war violence, communism, and starvation in their own countries). Some foreigners do qualify to be... Read more
To the Proverbs 31 Mom, yes you: Shhhh! Let’s keep it a secret. People think that you are a Proverbs 31 mother. (Smile, smile, wink, wink. Let’s not let them in on the stink!) You are busy working your magic. As wife and mom, you tend to your responsibilities. (Smile, smile, wink, wink. Let’s not let them in on the stink!) Let the praises flow freely. Let the generosity of spirit pervade your home. (Smile, smile, wink, wink. Let’s not... Read more
Social workers generally use the term marginalization to refer to the discriminatory treatment of an individual or minority group of people as a lesser status than the main or majority group. These folks are to be feared or treated with suspicion as an “other”. Dehumanization is usually the marginalization of people to an extreme degree. To dehumanize is to view folks not as a different kind of human, but a lesser kind of human, a subhuman or nonhuman. The “dominant”... Read more
In higher education today, it is widely taught that America is an imperialist, greedy capitalist, brutal colonizer of the innocent world. And chief among these sinners are white, Christian men. Therefore, caring, compassionate people need to get on the social justice bandwagon to “level the playing field” and fight the injustice. However, life and Scriptures have taught me that social justice is different than biblical justice. Christ did not come just for “the triply oppressed” or the “most marginalized people”. He... Read more
Americans celebrate Valentine’s Day on February 14th every year. You don’t have to be religious to recognize erotic or romantic love between a couple. However, Christians often point to agape love (that Creator God has toward His creation) as the basis from which other affections spring forth, including friendship (phileo love), familial love (storge), and couples’ bonding (erotic). In fact, the following sentiment is often shared by Christians on Valentine’s Day: Yet, it was a quote about love from... Read more
As a counselor who’s been in private practice for almost a decade now, I have observed that human relationships are full of challenges. The wounds from childhood and family members are often long-lasting, affecting our adult relationships, ability to function at work or connect with the neighbors, even our parenting journey. And since no one is God or raised by God, no one is spared from relationship struggles. Holiday blues are common after large family gatherings. Holidays are times often... Read more
Shame is a huge topic that cuts to the core of our common humanity. Shame keeps us in bondage to sin and self defeat. As famous TedTalk author and research professor, Brene Brown puts it, it’s a vulnerable emotion that must be dealt with openly, honestly, and with sensitivity. According to Dr. Brown, shame can be identified as feeling bad for what or who I am, while guilt is feeling bad for what I’ve done. Since shame has more to... Read more
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