My denomination of origin was composed of people that never liked to change their minds. Most of the adults throughout my childhood were the same way. They would say, “I’ve made up my mind and you’re not going to change it.” That is how we were with everything: religion, politics, work and even home life. There’s a certain benefit to determination. When we decide to do something, it is good to move forward and work through obstacles to reach a... Read more
Most of my life was about fitting in. I had thick glasses, I was short and skinny, and most of my life, we were financially poor. So I always felt like I was at a deficit and trying to make up for that. I wanted to be accepted by others– I wanted to fit in. After a decade in the business world, I decided to enter the ministry. We pastored several churches over 20 years and I was considered good... Read more
Yesterday, I heard someone talking on social media. They were wondering whether getting angry would put them in some kind of spiritual danger or make them vulnerable to the “devil” or evil. Religion has tried to indoctrinate us with the idea that emotions are dangerous or harmful or a waste of time. We were taught to bypass our emotions by using platitudes such as “God is in Control,” etc. Because we felt that we could not trust our feelings or... Read more
I used to walk to the pulpit and exclaim “I have nothing of value to say that is not contained in this book” as I held up my copy of the Bible. Over the years, my views about the Jewish and Christian scriptures changed, and they continues to evolve. For the most part, most major religions pluck their scriptures from a certain time in history or a certain person, and the rest of us are left to wrestle with the... Read more
I was a pastor for 20 years, mostly in smaller towns. I would blend into a community and relate with them and help them rehabilitate their church. Mega Church pastors told me the struggles of pastors are the same, no matter the size of the church. I came from the business world, but I obtained a seminary degree to help me understand what I was getting into. Mostly it just taught me how to wrangle the scriptures to match my... Read more
Photo courtesy of Broadway Diner, Columbia, MO This is where the novel begins. I pictured a forty something waitress that became pregnant in high school and never made her way out of the small Midwest town. Circumstances and hidden desires combine to inspire her to heal her wounds and face her obstacles. Her journey takes her to Florida and back again, as she and her close friends take the journey together, Jenny emerges as the hero of her own story... Read more
After starting my deconstruction, I began writing about all the things I was discovering. but even though I was uncovering gaps in my understanding of racial issues and queer concerns, I hesitated to put pen to paper much mainly because I realized my understanding was limited. After I gained some initial knowledge from some of the stories I heard, in Desert Sanctuary, I came out swinging and I tried to advocate for both of these communities. Spurred by George Floyd’s... Read more
Early on, in most versions of Christianity, disciples are taught to have faith in the beliefs of the tradition. They acknowledge that this is something that is unseen and not necessarily proven. I see this replayed over and over again. To me, these beliefs are unseen, unproven things are actually not truths, they are hypotheses. Oxford defines a hypothesis as: “A supposition or proposed explanation made on the basis of limited evidence as a starting point for further investigation.” So... Read more
I have always been adventurous. I’ve written about it several times before but the phrase that emerged is Leaning Forward. If all goes well, that will be the title of my next book in the fall. I don’t know if this will be coherent when I finish, but my hope is to communicate what I’ve been learning over the past 6 years since I started my deconstruction. Most of us are born and raised, accepting the beliefs of the people... Read more
My first encounter with Charles Stanley was when I read his book, The Wonderful Spirit Filled Life. I was a young adult looking for direction and the book seemed very clear to me. After reading it, I understood the role of spirit (something I couldn’t see) that somehow helped with things that seemed impossible. Oddly enough, it probably informed my focus as a mystic more than anything. I would later tune in to, and in many ways, Charles Stanley provided... Read more
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