Why You Aren’t Actually Entitled to Your Own Opinions

Opinions are like noses.  Everybody has one, and they’re always in your face.

Opinions are like armpits. Everybody has a couple, and sometimes, they stink.

There are other variations of course, but you get the idea. These are the things we say when we disagree with somebody else’s opinion.

If we are trying to keep the peace, or at least make a safe exit from the conversation without having to admit fault, we might say something like, “Everyone is entitled to their own opinion.” But are we really?

Everyone who has an opinion strong enough to give voice to it typically assumes that his or her opinion is the correct one.  Nevertheless, there’s always somebody who will disagree with that opinion and offer one of their own.

So how do you determine whose opinion is the right one?

Well, the truth is that NO opinion is the right opinion.  Here’s why.

Why Opinions Don’t Matter

An opinion is based on belief and perception with varying degrees of fact sprinkled in.  Different facts, beliefs and perceptions will lead to different opinions.  The one thing every opinion has in common, however, is that they are all based on an incomplete picture of the situation at hand.

Remember the maxim of the five blind men describing an elephant?

This parable dates all the way back to Buddha in the 5th Century BC. In it, a group of blind men, who have never encountered an elephant, come across one and attempt to describe it.
However, because each blind man is only touching one part of the elephant, his perception, and therefore his description, is incomplete.
American poet John G. Saxe set this story to verse, concluding thus:

And so these men of Indostan

Disputed loud and long,
Each in his own opinion
Exceeding stiff and strong;
Though each was partly in the right,

And all were in the wrong.

Each of these men knew facts about an elephant. Individually, their facts were accurate.  However, facts are not Truth. Facts are independent nuggets of information that require context to form a complete picture. These men had strong, fact-based opinions, but no context in which to test them. Therefore, as long as each clung to his opinion, Truth eluded them all.

From this, we can conclude that an opinion is simply somebody telling you what they think about what they don’t know.

Agree to Disagree?

Because opinions are based on incomplete information, and because people giving voice to theirs are convinced that they are right, opinions only serve the purpose of starting arguments.  Furthermore, these arguments have little hope of resolution.  For even if people make a show of listening to another’s opinion, they likely will still inwardly cling to their own.  Such conversations tend to arrive at a mock-civil status known as “agreeing to disagree.”

I believe the technical rhetorical term for that is “load of crap.”

A Truthseeker never agrees to disagree.  Rather than attempting to win the argument by holding an opinion in a death-grip to the end, a Truthseeker will do an end run around the argument to the common ground, seeking resolution in the relationship along with the Truth.

Remember the criteria for Truth:

1. 1.     Truth is Eternal—it was here before you got here and will remain, no matter what else changes.
   2.     Truth is Universal—it affects everyone in exactly the same way.
   3.     Truth is Indisputable—it is what is left over at the end of the argument.

Opinions simply do not fit these criteria.  If it is an opinion that you formed yourself, it started with you and will die with you (unless you manage to convince some people to carry it on after you are gone).  Therefore, opinions are not eternal.

Opinions definitely do not affect everyone the same way, or everyone would have the same opinion.  Therefore, opinions are not universal (duh).

Even more of a “duh” is that opinions are not indisputable.  In fact, they are at the very core of every dispute.

Therefore, we can only logically conclude that opinions are not Truth.  As such, NO opinion can be the right one.

Now here’s the sticky bit—that means that YOURS isn’t the right one either.

The Solution

So, what do we do then?  It’s simple, really.  Seek Truth instead of an echo chamber. You can’t stretch your perspective by only hanging around people who already agree with you.

Share Truth when you find it. The more people are aware of the Truth, the less they will seek out those echo chambers.

Above all, have nothing to do with opinions, regardless of the source.  As Paul advised Timothy:

Don’t have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels.  And the Lord’s servant must not quarrel; instead, he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful.  Those who oppose him he must gently instruct, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth. (2 Timothy 2:23-25 NIV 1984)

If opinions lead to arguments, and arguments are “foolish and stupid,” then how does an opinion profit anyone? The result is always division.  Even if you find someone who agrees with your opinion, someone else will disagree with both of you, and NONE of you will know what the elephant looks like.

Avoiding the Foolish and Stupid Arguments

Finding Truth is great, but we all must remember that, being eternal, the Truth was here before we were. Therefore, none of us OWNS the Truth. All we did was encounter it. We must maintain this sense of humility when sharing it.

The purpose must always be to lift a listener up to equal standing through the sharing of knowledge, not to tear them down with a superior attitude. The only difference between you and that person is what you learned today.  Yesterday, you were the same. The purpose of sharing Truth, then, is to restore balance, not to publicly esteem our own knowledge.

Also, we need to heed Paul’s advice to GENTLY instruct. This is easy for some people, but hard for most. If you open the conversation with, “You’re wrong,” or worse, “Why are you such an idiot?”, then whatever Truth you have found is neutralized by the fact that the other person isn’t listening to you because they think you’re an asshat.

A better way then is when a disagreement arises, and someone says they are entitled to their own opinion, respond with, “No one is entitled to an opinion, but EVERYONE is entitled to Truth.” And go from there.